Since I have obtained sobriety and am free from all of my party ways, I have found myself looking to fill my time. I want to work on this stronger, healthier, and more authentic version of myself. The first step on that journey was getting sober and staying that way! This took a lot more work than I ever expected.
Now that I am on the other side of sobriety and can assure myself that I have zero desire to fall back into old habits, I want to work on creating some new ones. In comes a favorite of mine, fitness.
Since I was young I have enjoyed activities based on physical agility and drive. Sports, track and field, soccer, really anything that involves some physical movement has always made me smile (as it does most people, actually).
That is why after many years of being back and forth with any athletic pursuits, I have decided to dive in to full body work outs. HIIT sessions are a great way to raise the heart rate, burn deeply while at the same time, constantly changing your sets to keep working out; fun and fast paced. Which are the two keys, (fun and fast paced) that made me fall in love with athletics at a young age.
So, with 2020 right around the corner I felt it was the perfect time to commit myself to the fit and healthy me I know I am inside! Although it is 2020 soon, the New Year itself did not spark this motivation.
Even while I was actively using, drinking, and partying.. every month or so I would go through this huge over drive and purge my self of all of my bad habits for a day, a week, or sometimes longer. Very sporadically I would decide I needed an over haul. So I would do that, change my entire life in one day. That would last for a little then I would go right back to my familiar routines and of course drinking and only worsening my health and state of mind.
One thing is certain though, even when I was at the lowest of some of my lows, my physical activity and health were always on my mind. I guess we can see what kind of damage we are doing, even if we don’t have the basic tools to help change that damage, at the time.
This is the first time the thought of getting fit and healthy isn’t overtaking my every thought or putting some huge amount of pressure on me. Instead it is bringing my excitement and a feeling of self-control which is much needed in my life.
The ability to control something. The ability to create something new. To re-create me!
On December 20, 2019 I am joining the gym! This is going to be a huge step on my recovery journey. I have joined gyms before with anxiety always jumping in the way of my goals. I always felt afraid to be on my own in a gym, overwhelmed and now that I am aware of why, and how I feel those things, they have become a lot simpler to navigate.
The gym is going to be a great place to feel my sobriety and also work on my body, mind, and spirit! Since, exercise also benefits your mood, and attitude you could say it deeply improves your mind’s function and your overall spiritual well-being.
I will be combining HIIT sessions, the gym, and biking into a set routine to bring me into 2020, and the future. Also, I will continue backpacking/hiking too!
This is the most calm, and excited I have been to take on a new project in a very long, long, long time. Words can’t even explain where I am at in my head this past year. It has been full of good and bad days, but something in me clicked. I am finally able to see where I’m able to go, not just where I came from! The future is bright friends! xo.